


My Greatest Fear!

by Stormborn_88



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Dad!Tony, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt Peter, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt Tony, Nightmares, One Shot, Parent Tony Stark, Protective Tony Stark, Son!Peter, dad tony, peter whump, son peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-07
Updated: 2017-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-11 21:17:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12944118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stormborn_88/pseuds/Stormborn_88
Summary: Peter wakes up at night from an all too real nightmare.





	My Greatest Fear!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Buckets_Of_Stars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buckets_Of_Stars/gifts).



> Since you guys seemed ok with my English the first time, I thought I'd try another story - since it makes kinda fun :)

His heart was hammering in his chest, he was trembling all over and his breath came in rough fast gasps as he stared to the ceiling over his bed with his eyes wide open. It almost felt like he was paralyzed. He just didn’t dare to move fearing that it could trigger something to make it all real. His brain was desperately trying to convince him that it was in fact just a dream. Nothing more. A dream. 

… But it could come true. He knew that. Someday it might just come true. And he knew he wouldn’t be able to survive that. The mere thought scared him already to death while they were both sleeping in their warm, comfortable beds just a few doors apart.

He started concentrating on his breathing. In and out, in and out. Slowly. He needed to calm himself down. Everything was fine. His dad was sound asleep down the hall. Breathing, healthy and alive. But…  
Peter’s eyes finally gave in as his tears started to run down his face. He didn’t want to cry, he was no little child anymore that cried for his daddy after having a nightmare. But the dream was so vivid, felt so real and although he hated to admit it wasn’t that unlikely to actually happen. So all he wanted right now was his dad.

He had dreamt of Iron-Man, of his dad, just as he did every now and then. When he was younger his dad was usually like a knight in shining armor saving people, defeating bad guys, fighting against any kind of imaginable alien and he’d always win - not much different from reality actually. But that had started to change recently. In his dreams he was still the hero he’d always be, but in the end… in the end someone or something killed him. The focal point of his dreams shifted more and more from the actual fight to Tony just dying, while Peter could do nothing but watch helplessly.

He curled into himself, silently sobbing. He knew where this new fear was coming from. He actually wondered why he didn’t have that fear much earlier, since it had always been there. Lurking in every street, around every corner. But he never noticed. Or at least he never dared to take a proper look at it. But on that day it came running out of all these streets and at every corner it screamed as loud as it could, while it crashed into Peter with full force, holding on to him ever since and not willing to let go.

It had been a normal Friday night. Peter had come home from school and started to prepare some supper, knowing that his dad was still on some charity event. He usually hated this kind of stuff, especially when he had to go alone. But Happy had joined Pepper on a business meeting in Shanghai - Tony would have loved to complain here, but it was his idea for Happy to tag along, so he could keep Pepper safe, so he could only curse himself. And Peter hated this kind of stuff even more than Tony did. Everyone was just way too nice to him, some in a natural way, but usually it felt annoyingly forced. No one really wanted to deal with a kid. Some even talked to him like he was still five years old. Just to be in Tony’s favor. So he kindly declined the generous offer of his dad to join him. At least Rhodes was there, but he was invited as War Machine, so he had his own stuff to deal with. Tony finally accepted the harsh reality of the day and went alone. Despite all his grumbling.

Peter switched on the news, knowing it would help him decide when to turn on the oven, since they’d definitely show the whole world how Tony Stark walked to his car, as if it would be the most thrilling thing on earth. He grinned when his dad came out of the door that very second, casually throwing his jacket over his shoulder and fumbling for his keys as if there was no horde of journalists in front of him. Tony had smirked at them for a second as he turned around again to someone Peter could not yet see.

After that he had no idea what exactly happened. He heard a few loud bangs as the news-camera stumbled to the ground. People were screaming and shouting and chaos spread over the screen, before it went back to the studio, the news-reporter apologizing and saying they didn’t know what happened, just that apparently someone tried to shoot Tony Stark, not knowing if that someone succeeded or not, before zapping back to the scene again. Peter stood in front of the screen. Frozen. He was waiting for Tony Stark storming out of the door to calm everyone down and make sure no one else got hurt. For Iron-Man to show up and try to find the one, who was shooting. He was waiting for his dad to be ok. To be alive. To not be hurt.

He didn’t even notice it when JARVIS was talking to him. “ _Master?... Master Peter?... Peter!_ ”

Peter startled. “Huh?”

“ _You’ve got a text message from Mr. Stark. I’m sorry, I know you don’t like it when I read them, but I’m sure you’d like to know._ ” JARVIS was talking very softly as to not startle Peter any further.

“Where is… when was it send? What does it say?” Peter panicked as he couldn’t find his phone immediately.

“ _Ten seconds ago. It says he got held up, but will be home in 30 minutes._ ”

Peter let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding and sank to the floor. Thank god. He is fine. Thank god. Thank god.

And just as promised Tony showed up exactly 30 minutes later as if nothing happened. He hadn’t been sure if Peter knew what happened, so he never mentioned anything in the text, but as his son crashed into him, hugging him as tightly as a 15 year old kid could, it was crystal clear that he knew. Tony had hugged him back, reassuring him that he was completely fine. That Rhodey pulled him back in time, that the evening got at least a bit exciting in the very end and that nothing like that could ever harm him, but Peter suddenly knew better. He had seen Iron-Man being under attack more than once, but he’d never seen his dad being attacked. It was stupid but that changed his whole way of seeing the dangers around him. Now he was in a constant fear someone could hurt his dad or Iron-Man, could kill him and take him away from him.

Peter felt sick at the mere thought. He jumped out of the bed and ran to the bathroom. In his rush he crushed into his desk causing the lamp to fall down with a loud bang as it broke into a few dozen pieces. He didn’t care. He ran to the toilet and threw up.

Despite his coughing and choking he could still hear someone running down the hall, before his bedroom door was forced open and his dad burst in. “Peter?!”

“… here…”, Peter mumbled just loud enough for his dad to hear, as he wiped his mouth and flushed the toilet.

The lights suddenly turned on and Peter groaned, squinting his eyes.

“You ok, Pete?” Tony voice was full of concern as he kneeled down next to his son, placing one hand on his shoulder as the boy simply nodded weakly and tried to get up.

Tony frowned and got up himself, steadying Peter casually. “Yeah, sure. Let’s pretend I believe you for only a minute while you brush your teeth.” He looked over his shoulder to the broken pieces of the former lamp. “You know there’s a German saying… Sharps bring luck. Or was it misfortune? I think it’s luck, but then I don’t get the whole fussing over broken mirrors.”

Peter stared at his dad as he chattered away and without realizing he was even moving he was suddenly hugging the man, burying his head in his chest.

Tony was puzzled only for a very short moment before he enveloped Peter in his arms. He slid one hand to the back of Peter’s neck and stroked it slowly with his thumb. He looked down at him gravely as he could feel the boy trembling in the embrace.

“Will you tell me what’s going on?” He asked as careful as he could.

No response.

Tony tried again. “I haven’t asked before, since I hoped you’d come to me, when you’re ready, but… you’re just too quiet lately and I miss your constant chattering, kid.”

No response.

Tony sighted. “Come on. Let’s get you to bed, bambi.”

Suddenly Peter tightened his grip around Tony making a small whining noise, just loud enough to be heard. Tony paused.

“Peter… hey… look at me.” He brought his hands to Peter’s head, pulling it back gently so Peter could see the determination in his face.

“I’m not going anywhere, ok. I’ll stay as long as you want me too. Come on.”

Reluctantly Peter followed Tony’s lead, never losing his grip on Tony’s shirt. Not that he wanted to stay in the bathroom, but he wanted to stay in that moment. Them being fine and safe, while holding onto each other. He wished he could just freeze that moment.

Tony placed them on Peter’s bed, his hands never leaving Peter’s shoulders, reassuring him that he wasn’t going to let go.

“Here…” Tony held up some pepper mint. “Eat this at least. Otherwise I'll feel like I failed in fatherhood if I let you go to bed like that.”

Peter blinked irritated.

“Found it on your desk. It IS pepper mint, right?” Tony asked suspiciously. “Cause if it’s not I’d feel like the world’s biggest hypocrite giving you a lecture about the abuse of stimulants.” He squinted dramatically with a hand on his bridge. “Ah, I can already hear my father laughing at me from his tomb.”

Peter finally smiled and reached out. “Pepper mints.”

Peter knew he had to say something while he was half chewing on a couple of mint drops. But he felt pathetic enough as it was. Sitting on his bed in the middle of the night, needing his dad to almost literally hold his hand and feeling uneasy every time the man moved a little, in fear he could disappear.

“Ok, I’ll start then.” Tony finally said, startling Peter a little since he’d gotten used to the silence around them. “Given the location and time… did you have a nightmare?”

Peter nodded, chewing on the last pepper mint.

Tony frowned. “Does this happen a lot lately?”

Another nod.

This time Tony sighted. “Peter. Please, tell me what’s bothering you, so I can help you. I want my chatterbox of a son back.”

“But you can’t help. Not with this.” Tony was almost glad that Peter didn’t look at him. Like this he didn’t notice the short hurt expression that crossed his face, before he collected himself again. _At least he talks._

“Dare me.”

Another silent treatment.

“Back to the questioning then… when did those nightmares start?” Tony was far from giving up. He’d sit here all night long if need be.

Peter shrugged his shoulders. “A few weeks ago.”

Tony frowned as he tried to concentrate and thought back… a few week ago. Did anything... _Idiot_. Tony finally cursed himself. _Stupid braindead idiot_.

“After the shooting?”

Peter froze but nodded a moment later.

 _The shooting. Of course_. He almost slapped himself for not seeing that before. It wasn’t a pleasant experience, yes, but with all the Iron-Man issues going on, it didn’t bother him as much as it apparently should have. Plus it also happened before. Being Tony Stark meant having enemies. Business rivals and competitors, activists with all possible and impossible believes, enviers, maniacs… even some horned husbands - back in the old days. And every now and then an alien or two, gods, rebellious A.I.s. This crazy list went on and on. He long learned to brush a simple, quite clumsy attempt like that shooting off of him. Kind of alarming, now that he thought about it.

He was suddenly at a loss of words. Peter never learned about a lot of things that threatened to hurt or kill Tony, most of them happened before he was born, others never got public and Tony would be damned to tell him about it. But nonetheless Peter knew, saw and read about a lot of other incidents as well. So how was this any different?

“I know it’s stupid to suddenly feel so anxious, but dad, this was different… somehow.” Peter suddenly found his voice again, sparing Tony any further thought about what to say.

“What do you mean?” Tony’s voice was full of concern.

“You were… you. You were not Iron-Man or in any special situation. You were just you, doing something you sort of do every other day.” Peter’s lethargy had completely vanished as he now stared intensely at his dad with pained eyes.

“And that scared you?” Tony just wanted Peter to go on without too much input of him.

Peter nodded a few time. “But that’s not really it. I know things like this happen to you sometimes." He cringed. "But usually your're in your suit… so this... I don't know... it somehow opened a door. I have no idea why I handled it so lightly before, but dad you could've died.”

Tony’s insides twisted by the desperate sound in his son’s voice.

“Something like that won’t…”

“You don’t know. You can’t.” Peter pushed himself a little further away from his dad to properly look at him, while his fingers dug in Tony’s shirt, never loosing contact. “That man could have hit you. Or anyone of the others you fought. And I know that it was close sometimes, I know! But never before did it cross my mind that you might not be able to come back home one day.” Peter’s face turned into an expression full of pain. “When there was a new Avenger mission I was always so excited. I couldn’t wait to hear everything about it from you, Nat or Oncle Bruce afterwards. I never really thought about the risks. It was just normal, a given that you’ll come back. But it’s not. I finally realized that. You could leave and never come back. You could leave me and never come back to me... Dad!” Tony witnessed as Peter’s emotions overflowed from his eyes as the exhausted boy started to cry. He immediately pulled Peter close to offer as much comfort as he possibly could give.

“Calm down, love. Calm down. I’m here. I’m fine. I won’t leave you.” Tony could feel his own eyes burning while his son was crying in his arms.

“Now… b-but later…” Peter sobbed heart wrenchingly. “It’s-s so… so s-scary. I’d-d nev-er survive th-that. Just thi-thinking 'bout it hurts…”

The loss of words from earlier had taken a hold of Tony as it seemed. Seeing his son so devastated by the mere thought of losing him, broke him. His heart tightened and the lump in his throat actually pained him. What was he going to tell Peter? He wasn’t wrong. Not at all. Something could happen.

He pulled him closer and buried his face in Peter’s hair as they both sought shelter in the other one’s embrace. It took a while for Tony to pull away, swiping the tears off Peter’s cheeks.

“You know, Steve once blamed me that I’d never step on the wire. I know that isn’t completely true, as does Steve. But it isn’t exactly wrong as well. I do step back every once in a while, because of you. Because you're waiting for me at home. And because I know you need me, just as much as I need you. And that means it isn’t my life alone I’d risk out there. And I would never, you hear me, never ever risk your life. Not in a billion years.” He smiled at the big watery eyes now pointed at him. “So even though I’m Iron-Man and a _hero_ …” He formed quotation marks with his hand. “… as some people would call me, I tell you I’m not. I’m selfish, since I love my life with you, and I never want to miss anything of yours. So, damn Steve, but shall he step on the bloody wire. I’d rather have pizza with you.” Peter’s eyes were still as big, but his face slowly turned into a small smile. “Hate to break it to you, but you won’t get rid of me.”

Finally Peter broke into a full smile, embracing Tony happily for the first time this night, while the man laughed and patted his back. They just stayed like this for a while, enjoying the calm aftermath and the company of one another, as Tony summoned the result of the night up. “By the way, do we still have pizza? All these emotions made me quite a bit hungry.”

Peter laughed as he wiped the last tears out of his eyes. “We never have leftover pizza. We eat too much.”

“Damn.” He sulked for a second as Peter yawned heartbreakingly.

“Okok, to bed then.” He stretched himself out on Peter’s bed. “I’m way too tired to make it back to my room. So, gotta have to share the bed for the night… or what’s left of it.” He cursed the numbers on the watch.

Peter thankfully snuggled next to him. “Good night, dad.”

“Good night, son.” Tony replied as he pulled the blanket over them both and drove a hand through his son’s hair, while Peter turned around and closed his eyes, making sure his back never lost contact to his dad's shoulder.

His mind was somewhat appease now that he knew his dad was exceptionally vigilant and careful in any kind of fight. He’d thought that he didn’t mind being rather reckless especially during fights with the Avengers, since he seemed to have a little too much fun sometimes, given that in the end it was a serious fight. But knowing that Peter and coming-home-again was his number one priority comforted him immensely.

 _But still_ … Peter’s eyes opened again and he stared out of his window. That didn’t mean nothing could happen to him. There would always be something trying to hurt or kill his dad. Threatening to destroy their lives, their happiness. That thought still hurt and made his stomach turn… _but he’s being careful. Concentrate on that. He won’t risk too much. He’ll come back_ …

Tony stared at the back of his son's head, still softly moving his fingers through his hair. He could feel his own smile crumble a bit. He didn’t lie. He was always considerate of Peter when he was in the field, but something could happen either way. He knew that. Otherwise he would never have taken precautions to what would happen to Peter and his life if – god forbid – he would not be able to make it back home some day. Not that he would tell Peter about it. But his main concern was to ensure that he would be cared for. And so he did. A long time ago. He knew Happy, Pepper and every single one of the Avengers would be there for him, would love him as much as they already did. But he just got a glimpse of what would happen to Peter should that day ever come. Tony finally wiped some tears of his own cheeks. It tortured him to know that he wouldn’t be able to comfort his son in that moment. That Peter would cry out for him, but he wouldn’t be able to come running and hold him till he stopped crying like as he just did. And that thought hurt. It hurt like hell.

**Author's Note:**

> First of all: This is my story so rest assured that in this story-verse no one dies :) The fear is there, but nah, as if I’d let that happen even ‘off-screen’ to those two.
> 
> 2nd: Yeeees, I kinda had to put bits of my own fear into this one, since I'm honestly terrified that Tony might die in the next two movies - since everyone says a "big death" would happen. That. Would. Suck. So much!! Picturing the movies ending heroical in any way but him being dead is horrible. I never really cry, but I'd cry rivers in that case - probably leaving the theatre ahead of time totally pissed off!  
> I just want someone to tell me "no no, don't worry. He'll live", so I can relax and not be scared for the next 2 years. Gaaaah x)
> 
> As if Robert Downey Jr. is getting to old for Iron-Man! When Liam Neeson can still be running around acting like James Bond, he can be Tony for many more years ^^ Seriously!  
> So let’s all hope he'll survive the movies – cause honestly his death would ruin soo much for me – yes, overdramatic me :p
> 
> But I know I’m not alone in this one, since he's the greatest fan favorite of all the Avengers! So Marvel - make more money with him xD


End file.
